-Gonna get him. Oh wait on, I'll just get this guy.
-Um excuse me, would you mind taking a photo of us?
-Yeah, no problem!
-Okay! Everybody say "cheese!"
-Oh I'm actually--I'm a vegan. Could you please have us say something else?
-Okay, everybody say... "tofu".
-Tofu is not actually as good for you as vegan, see, any hospital will tell you that it's bad for your testosterone levels.
-Okay I'm sorry, how about we all just smile?
-Oh, one more asshole asks me to smile!
-Not really an asshole, takin' a photo for you, so...
-What is it to smile about anyway?
-O...kay...would you want me to just count backwards from three?
-Oh! Would you like dyslexic people to just not exist!
-My cousin has dyslexia, so, offended.
-Adopted. Don't even know who my cousins are, so more offended.
-How about this: we all put a word we are comfortable with in our heads, and I'll get this shot.
-No, it doesn't sound very inclusive thought does it? I suppose you'd like us all to stand a few meters apart with you stalling?
-Oh I don't see what religion has to do with this?
-Well, I'm an atheist, so, majorly triggered.
-Is that a comment on the gun debate? Huh, still trying to control people.
-But it's not just the people, has anyone thought about the animals?
-Look, this is what we're gonna do, everybody throw up a peace sign, and I'll take your photo.
-Wow. Cultural appropriation is alive and well. Why don't you just ask us to say Kung Fu?
-Guess what? New plan, group selfie, ready, set, go. Boom, and... looks awesome, you're gonna love it.
-Oh, you took it with the front camera you stupid cyclist dick!
“This would be more funny if it were not painfully reflective of life in 2019. Everyone is offended, everyone is oppressed, everyone is a victim.”
“I'm not laughing because this is reality now”